Truth challenges me today. I am pre-menstrual. Stuck in a VERY small office with five males all talking at the top of their voices. Working on a deadline for documents that need to be issued to my business users at four this afternoon. I’m not sure whether I should burst out in tears or jump up and rip out a tongue or two. Shouting, who cares what you think – no-one. And chanting to myself. “It’s only the hormones, its only the hormones, it’s only the hormones.”
Day like today strips me right down to a space where I need to decide, do I want to be the kind of person who takes my mood out on others or do I want to allow the freaked out me to curl up into a little ball and take a nap somewhere in my womb? Just focus on the task ahead and keep going. I can cry this evening when I get home.
Day like today strips me right down to a space where I need to decide, do I want to be the kind of person who takes my mood out on others or do I want to allow the freaked out me to curl up into a little ball and take a nap somewhere in my womb? Just focus on the task ahead and keep going. I can cry this evening when I get home.
2 comments:
i say you let the freaked out you have just a second or two to have her say, then you politely tell her you'll deal with her in a little bit, and finally, when you get home give her a nice treat so she knows you still love her...even when she's pms-ing...
I'd rise up like fury itself and snap "Can't you all just shut up for a moment? I have a deadline I need to meet." before subsiding in my chair and drawing my dark cloud of anger close around me. Sometimes it is OK to be angry. Sometimes people just don't realize that they're being intolerable.
Of course, I fairly seldom lose my temper with other people, and I do that for a reason. It makes it helluva effective when I do.
When the frustration and anger demands a release and I don't want to lose my temper, I set the frustration free. I used to curl it up into a tiny, dense ball, compress it and hide it away. I found that such a ball expands to twice its side when you release the binding pressure on it - and you have to release, or it will poison you. Instead, I set my anger and frustration free when it forms, and it dissipates like steam. I don't give it time to smoulder, because smoke can't dissipate as easily.
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