"Whoever wishes to quickly protect
Himself and all other beings
Should embrace this sacred mystery:
The exchanging of oneself for others."
Santiveda
Welcome to the December Just Posts - super special anniversary edition. Jen suggested that "because we are celebrating our one year anniversary, we figured it was time to give birth so we are also having a baby shower symbolized by birthing our words into action via volunteerism."
The gifts are piled up at the end of this post and can also be viewed at Jen, Mad and Susanne's places. The baby is a magic baby who already loves to dance around with spirit around the kitchen table and out into the garden whenever she finds someone ready to to start.
The gifts are piled up at the end of this post and can also be viewed at Jen, Mad and Susanne's places. The baby is a magic baby who already loves to dance around with spirit around the kitchen table and out into the garden whenever she finds someone ready to to start.
Recently I joined this dance by volunteering at a community mental health center. Poorer community members are able to see trained counselors for up to ten sessions and only pay as much as they can afford.
The center also trains people within various communities who already fulfill the role of counselors withing their communities. One program trains prostitutes to counsel each other, another trains nurses working with HIV patients in a government clinic.
The center also trains people within various communities who already fulfill the role of counselors withing their communities. One program trains prostitutes to counsel each other, another trains nurses working with HIV patients in a government clinic.
Children who have lost one or more caretakers attend workshops where they create books celebrating those they loved and lost. I accompany the adopted daughter of a psychologist to the shops. She assures me with soulful eyes that her positive status makes it ok for her eat as much sugar as she wants since she is going to die anyway.
When I don't buy into this she demands to know how many people in my family have died from Aids. She labels me boring when I admit to no casualties. Eventually she settles for a fruit juice and a packet of chips and happily chats about her mother's cooking, which is surely better than mine.
When I don't buy into this she demands to know how many people in my family have died from Aids. She labels me boring when I admit to no casualties. Eventually she settles for a fruit juice and a packet of chips and happily chats about her mother's cooking, which is surely better than mine.
Because I do not yet feel equipped to deal with counseling I help with the admin. I'm learning a lot about the difference between reality and books. Parents bring their children in and disappear with them as soon as their screaming nightmares stop but before they they benefit from a slowly established relationships of trust.
A mother repeatedly alienates everyone around her. Her children gets moved with her which robs them of the improvement a program brings to their lives. Volunteering teaches me the realities of the field I want to enter into, allows me to meet amazingly dedicated people and teaches me to observe and learn .
A mother repeatedly alienates everyone around her. Her children gets moved with her which robs them of the improvement a program brings to their lives. Volunteering teaches me the realities of the field I want to enter into, allows me to meet amazingly dedicated people and teaches me to observe and learn .
However, volunteering has also birthed many confusing questions. Why my need to do this work? Am I trying to heal my own past through people who are the results of their own pasts and experiences and deserve respect for their resilience rather than their pain?
"It is equally important that the therapist become able to accept his nursing infant fantasies towards the patient, whether female or male, for otherwise the patient cannot learn deeply to accept his own desires to nurture-the principle basis of all givingness."
Collected Papers On Schizophrenia And Related Subjects - Searles, Harold
"[...] the therapist's own pride might be the most subtle and dangerous of all. The pride that can develop insidiously in healing of any kind is well known. Along with some expertise in alleviating suffering comes respect and considerable personal power, as well as the tendency for the healer to become deluded by pride.
In the case of the psychotherapist, this translates into a pride that one understands the minds of others, that one knows what is best for them, and that one has the privilege of imposing one's will or prescription on them"
Recovering Sanity - Podvoll, Edward
In the case of the psychotherapist, this translates into a pride that one understands the minds of others, that one knows what is best for them, and that one has the privilege of imposing one's will or prescription on them"
Recovering Sanity - Podvoll, Edward
My sister often reminds me that she does not need me to fix her, she only needs me to listen to her and respect her ability to make her own choices. And she is right. Like water her spirit adapts and flows and sparkles as it catches the sun.
I suspect that all volunteers working with others, myself included, need to constantly remind ourselves of the exquisite strength and complexity of each human being that we come in contact with. To respect their resourcefulness in being who they are and to know that although we are all united in our humanness we need to humbly acknowledge the uniqueness of each living being.
I also suspect that doing volunteer work, by presenting us with realities so different from our own, offers us the opportunity to practice seeing those around us for what they are, not what we think they should be.
I also suspect that doing volunteer work, by presenting us with realities so different from our own, offers us the opportunity to practice seeing those around us for what they are, not what we think they should be.
So as we stand gathered around this beautiful child of Mad and Jen I am awed by the responsibility and joy I feel in wanting to do this right.
Lets dance.
The Gifts
Jenn with Let's change the world, shall we?
Omaha Mama with Giving more and Teaching to Give Back
Andrea with Enough, again.
CCE with A words: Altruism and Asceticism
De with Oh baby,I can help
Sage with Birthing in chains
Karen with Baby shower treats
Omaha Mama with Giving more and Teaching to Give Back
Andrea with Enough, again.
CCE with A words: Altruism and Asceticism
De with Oh baby,I can help
Sage with Birthing in chains
Karen with Baby shower treats
Alejna with Gifts and thanks
Jennifer with New Year's resolving
Reality Testing with Project Snuggle in conjunction with Flutter's original idea in 2006 there once was a girl
Aliki with Newton's third law
Painted Maypole with Unto us a child is born
Sin with Win-win
The Psycho Therapist with On giving to organizations
Flutter with Impatience be gone! Quickly!
Sober Briquette with Lots of goodness, all wrapped up together
Reality Testing with Project Snuggle in conjunction with Flutter's original idea in 2006 there once was a girl
Aliki with Newton's third law
Painted Maypole with Unto us a child is born
Sin with Win-win
The Psycho Therapist with On giving to organizations
Flutter with Impatience be gone! Quickly!
Sober Briquette with Lots of goodness, all wrapped up together
Conversations overheard at the party
Laura at Twenty Five Days to Make a Difference
Lawyer Mama with Christmas in Omaha
Magpie with 13 Ways to Help
Painted Maypole with God loves Fags
Reluctant Memsahib with it's the corruption that's the problem
Victoria with Give
Lawyer Mama with Christmas in Omaha
Magpie with 13 Ways to Help
Painted Maypole with God loves Fags
Reluctant Memsahib with it's the corruption that's the problem
Victoria with Give
The Chick with AIDS facts you should know
Jeff with Bless the invisible children
Mir on blogher with Dutch Diplomats, a Korean Adoptee, and the Unthinkable
Suzanne Reisman on Blogher with Dec. 17 is International Day to End Violence Against Sex Workers and When Will We See Some Female Geeks?
Chatoyance with Books will fly through the air for children
Jenn with full circle
Sin with 28
Frieda with What I would pray for, if I prayed
Jeff with Bless the invisible children
Mir on blogher with Dutch Diplomats, a Korean Adoptee, and the Unthinkable
Suzanne Reisman on Blogher with Dec. 17 is International Day to End Violence Against Sex Workers and When Will We See Some Female Geeks?
Chatoyance with Books will fly through the air for children
Jenn with full circle
Sin with 28
Frieda with What I would pray for, if I prayed
Hearts in SanFran with Only the good die young
HearthTalks with Putting it in perspective
Liz with AIDS: No longer your friendly neighborhood appetite suppressant
Chani with Sanuk is not a four letter word
Veronica with Give
Jen with it's coming on christmas, two little girls, two little girls pt 2
HearthTalks with Putting it in perspective
Liz with AIDS: No longer your friendly neighborhood appetite suppressant
Chani with Sanuk is not a four letter word
Veronica with Give
Jen with it's coming on christmas, two little girls, two little girls pt 2
Lost White Kenyan Chick with Electioneering and corruption
Laloca with Joseph Heller couldn't've come up with this
City Girl with thinking out loud
Ida with Gay and Homeless: The numbers to back it up
Quaker Dave with There are no words
Denguy with Everyone should eat
Jangari with Intervening into the intervention
Laloca with Joseph Heller couldn't've come up with this
City Girl with thinking out loud
Ida with Gay and Homeless: The numbers to back it up
Quaker Dave with There are no words
Denguy with Everyone should eat
Jangari with Intervening into the intervention
Emily with Lazy mother's guide to saving the planet
The Individual Voice with Christmas in Iraq and Afganistan
Babylune with it's series of posts culminating with the generous december group writing project
MauiGirl with No more death penalty in New Jersey
Reya with What's important
The Psycho Therapist with If you can't find money to kill people
The Individual Voice with Christmas in Iraq and Afganistan
Babylune with it's series of posts culminating with the generous december group writing project
MauiGirl with No more death penalty in New Jersey
Reya with What's important
The Psycho Therapist with If you can't find money to kill people
Those who listened
TIV: The Individual Voice
Crazymumma
LawyerMama
Painted Maypole
Chani
Jennifer
Mayberry Mom
Pundit Mom
Susanne
Hel
Mad
Jen
Crazymumma
LawyerMama
Painted Maypole
Chani
Jennifer
Mayberry Mom
Pundit Mom
Susanne
Hel
Mad
Jen
If you have any stories on volunteerism or social justice you have a whole month to let your words dance around your blog, and look around for others having a dance with volunteering or social justice, and mail the links to me at hwagener (at) gmail (dot) com.
12 comments:
"constantly remind ourselves of the exquisite strength and complexity of each human being that we come in contact with. To respect their resourcefulness in being who they are and to know that although we are all united in our humanness we need to humbly acknowledge the uniqueness of each living being"
With this kind of talk, someday you'll be accepting a Nobel Peace Prize. Thank you for sharing your incredible outlook.
i was going to repeat that line from your post that De already so perfectly did. exactly, exactly, exactly YES. so beautiful, Hel. and that one picture of the dogs where they are sharing a secret? priceless.
i want to volunteer with you, at that place.
What a beautiful post. Again. That project you're working at sounds marvelous.
You inspire me to dance, every day.
That volunteer commitment sounds so very rewarding and challenging. Your ability to talk about it and frame it all is nothing short of poetic.
What a beautifully illustrated and inspiring post! Full of love and eagerness. The canine moods and acts and beauty seeping in without effort, and the ideas just popping to the surface one after another.
Thanks for this.
Big thanks.
I must now go in deeper and see what else you have in your blog.
FA
I think listening or witnessing is probably the hardest thing to do.
As always, I love your dogs. They make me feel better.
this endeavor has been inspiring on so many levels to me. i am happy to have been a part of just posts on and off in the past year.
this transcontinental effort amazes me.
Stellar post...in so many ways. Thank you, thank you. I believe I am now armed with enough blog posts to pursue to last at least a month.
Of personal resonance is the question frequently posed by "helpers" to themselves: why am I doing this? Over time, it is interesting to watch the "answers" change in ebb and flow.
And I am frequently kept humble by the awareness each of us knows what is necessary/best for our own healing. I can assist and that is enough.
Thanks again, for all you do.
--
What a different reality some people live. You are doing a beautiful act of kindness by volunteering your time, your energy, your acceptance and love. You are a ray of light, Hel.
And those photos... gorgeous!
Thank you for this...three more nifty blogs to read now. How cool is that?
Laura at 25 Days and Angela at Reality Testing
Thanks for linking to the Generous December Group Writing porject. I am glad it struck a chord with people and that so many people understood what I was trying to do.
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